I'm the eldest in a large family where the kids are pretty spaced out (time wise, not mentally - well, sometimes mentally) and I dearly love all of my siblings. Being part of this large brood also helped me realize that I don't want the same set up for myself which is why, at the tender age of 39, I am pregnant with my first and (as the plan currently stands) only child.
I was 16 and 18 when two of my younger siblings were born and that right there is a learning experience for all teens who think having a baby will be "someone cuddly who loves me." I saw firsthand how much WORK these little people are. Yes, they were VERY cute and lovable. And also a boatload of work. I crossed my legs then and there and said "No, thank you very much" ... until now.
J. is an only child and, before I met him, I had a (mistaken) belief that all only children are spoiled ('cause I'm judgey like that). He is so far from being spoiled; he is, however, intelligent, healthy and stable, and has a solid sense of self - who he is and what he believes. That. I want that for our boy. I want him to be happy and intelligent and sure of who he is and his place and belonging in this world.