Sunday, February 21, 2010

struggling

I am really struggling through this mental muck. Nightmares, worry and anxiety and general twitchiness, on the verge of tears...I'm having a hard time shaking this off and getting through to the other side.

Words my mom shared with me the other day that she learned from her therapist:

May I be free from danger.
May I be happy.
May I be healthy.
May I live with ease.


Something for me to hold on to as I'm grappling with this pain and fear and circumstances that are beyond my control.


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On a good note: today is my husband's birthday and we will celebrate him in all his wonderfulness. I am so grateful for him.

And another good thing: I've lost almost 14 lbs since the beginning of 2010. :)

2 comments:

  1. Breathe in love
    Breathe out fear

    know that the muck is temporary.

    Celebrate the 14lbs, celebrate your husband
    know that you are not alone

    ReplyDelete
  2. The dry bones feeling may be our inner self's way of calling us into greater wholeness.
    I thought of you when I read this passage this morning...

    tiredness grounds me
    into a quiet stupor
    of the spirit.

    i yearn to be inspired,
    to be lifted up, set free
    beyond the place of deadness.

    the struggle goes on,
    however,
    and you and I
    we exist together
    with seemingly
    little communion

    yet in the deepest part of me
    i believe
    perhaps more strongly than ever

    i am learning you
    as silence
    of darkness deep and strong.

    i do not wrestle anymore,
    only wait, only wait
    for you to bring my dry bones
    into dancing once again

    take good care.

    ReplyDelete